Bosman, Wilco
(2022)
Chronic Shame and Spiritual Care.
Master thesis, Master Geestelijke Verzorging.
Abstract
The study aims to explore the current understanding of chronic shame among spiritual counselors in the Netherlands. Although an understanding of chronic shame has proved highly relevant within psychology concerning different aspects of therapy, therapeutic relationships, the client, and the therapist himself, the relevance of chronic shame within the Dutch field of spiritual care is unclear and therefore exploration of the subject is required. Currently, it is unclear in what way the spiritual counselors themselves and by extension the field of spiritual care benefit from an understanding of chronic shame. Therefore a preliminary literature study was done which shows different relations between chronic shame and spiritual care that may contribute to supporting the relevance of chronic shame in the field. Reviewing the literature on the understanding of chronic shame within Dutch spiritual care was attempted in several ways. One way was to look for articles or books originating from Dutch spiritual care about chronic shame, and another was to look for any research on the relation between the two within The Netherlands. Despite many attempts, this proved unsuccessful throughout the entire course of the research. Since no direct sources could be found addressing how spiritual counselors in the Netherlands relate to chronic shame, no information was gathered on how they understand or deal with it. So there was a gap in the literature and thus no insight into the relationship between chronic shame and Dutch spiritual care.
By interviewing Dutch spiritual counselors on chronic shame and reviewing it through the theoretical framework, the research attempts to contribute to several debates concerning different aspects of the profession. Through the interdisciplinary exploration of chronic shame and spiritual care, it is probed whether this niche may provide preliminary insight into future opportunities for improving the field of spiritual care in The Netherlands.
The motivation for writing the thesis is most accurately illustrated in the following story. During the internship to become a spiritual counselor, I experienced several long and intense periods of anxiety. Whether during casual coffee breaks in a residential living room, when the supervisor asked about my feelings on what happened between another student and me, or when I was writing something that would be reviewed, anxiety was roaring down almost any other feeling. I was also occasionally shocked when I noticed an extremely punitive, harsh, and demanding tone with which I was talking to myself, sometimes for multiple days. Although I finished my internship, and we addressed social anxiety, low self-esteem, perfectionism, and isolation, it felt as if I was still missing a large piece of the puzzle.
During the summer break, I came across the term existential guilt, which someone feels when ‘[…] he injures an order of the human world whose foundations he knows and recognizes as those of his own existence and of all common human existence’. I was somehow deeply moved by this description, which made me reflect on it. Shortly thereafter, I read ‘Shame is the part of us that feels beaten up by the inner critic, accepting what it says as true and believing that we are unworthy, not enough, too much, fundamentally broken, and maybe better off dead’. Feeling even more understood than before, I continued reading and came across chronic shame. After a while, I started to wonder what would’ve changed if I had learned about chronic shame earlier, during, or perhaps even before my internship.
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